Tuesday, February 21, 2006

A Question Out Of Nowhere

Long distance dating. How many of you tried it? Succeeded at it? Failed at it? Vowed never again to attempt it? Have no suitable partners in your hometown, so you have to resort to it? Love having your space and independence because of it? Face numerous temptations because of it?

There's a very popular saying in Spanish: "amor de lejos, amor de pendejos..." which translates to long distance love is stupid love. Overheard some women in the 'bucks coffee house in my hood using the phrase tonight. And of course I had to check in to see what my peeps think.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

I actually thought about it once. I fell for someone that lived four hours away, and he didn't think it was a good idea, but not because of the distance. Now he lives in the same state as me and apparently my stock has risen or something because he's really into me now. Go figure...

N4R said...

Long distance dating sucks but it seems I am only attracted or only get to meet people who live out of CT. With that being the case I am forced to date LD. Ultimately I can handle it with out cheating but that wasn't the case with my past partners. What can you do? I would do another LD, shit it seems that is the only way I can get a man.

Joseph said...

I have a hard time starting and keeping a relationship, simply because I have goals and things (mainly writing) that need my full attention. And so, it's hard finding someone to understand that.

Anyhow, I met this one guy online and even though we started out as online friends, soon we were having hour long conversations both online and over the phone, etc. Over the course of a year this guy knew more about me than most of the guys I had met to that point. Eventually calling it a relationship, even if just online, was more than appropriate. Then he moved to my city, which of course meant we would be able to include our bodies into the mix, you know. However, and even though we were attracted to one another physically and all, the minuted he arrived and we started hanging out and doing things together it become obvious (at least to me) that the magic wasn't there.

I think that we had gotten so comfortable with having a relationship over the phone and thru e-mails (I mean... from 9PM to 11Pm was 'talk on the phone' with so and so time), that the idea of having to put aside out more time to spend was exhausting.

Now, you are probably thinking 'if you were into him it wouldn't have mattered', right? The thing is that most relationships fall into a rountine anyway, and he had in mine which was between 9-11, so trying to include him any other time was really impossible.

So, while we do truly learn more about ourselves because the person isn't right at our nose, Iwouldn't do long distance relationships. It's like the one guy you have been crushing over forever and then you hang out...